Thursday, July 9, 2009

Chance; my little wizzer

I would like to welcome old pal, Mitch, as a guest blogger! It appears obvious that all my potty training talk inspired him to share this story.

Thanks Mitch!


As you have all heard “time” has a way of easing what at one time may have been an embarrassing moment and changing it to something we can actually laugh at and share with others who may be going through rough times.

Years ago… before the really cool pull-ups….The time of the Underoo’s, you know, “Underroos are fun to wear…Something super new in underwear”…Okay maybe not that long ago but sounded good didn’t it!

My wife and I were in the midst of potty training our son Chance and were in the mode of continually asking, “hey bud do you need to go potty” and his response was usually “Nope”, (and we would wonder to ourselves how can a kid so long with out going to the bathroom?) and he would continue on doing what ever he was doing, but we kept him in ear shot or line of sight….At least most of the time.

Well on one of those days that kind of fell into the “we kept him in ear shot or line of sight” and “At least most of the time”, I was working in my garage, head under hood of my continually broken (as my wife would say “You had to have it”) Italian sports car. I get a phone call from my next door neighbor, “Hey Mitch do you have any idea where Chance is?” my response of course, “Ya he is right hereeeee” (Head looking around and to my head under the hood amazement he was not), His response, “Nice try, you might want to look in the front yard but be quiet about it so you do not scare him”. I came around the corner and Chance was standing on the huge boulder in our garden pants to ankles (Booty free to the wind ) and was peeing on the Alaska weeping cedar (And thinking to my self now I know he does not really go along time with out going pee he gives it to Nature) .

I waited for him to finish and crawl down off the rock and asked him "What's up with peeing on the tree", he said "I learned it from Papa" (Outta the mouth of babes) later I called my dad and asked what was up with that? He said that my Mother yells at him (my dad) for tracking grass into the house when he mows so he uses the back yard trees (Way to much information I know but part of the story!) So I explained to Chance in my best Dadonese voice, "I really appreciate the peeing outside buddy and I think for a boy it is actually pretty cool, but in the front yard where the entire cul-de-sac could see may not be the best place"

(While in the corner of my eye I see my neighbor who called laughing in his front window). Well I thought that would emphasize the use of the inside bathroom and no more worries…. (One week later) I hear my wife calling for me from inside the house, (Of course my head under the hood and working on the car she has grown to loath), “Mitchell Allen do you have any idea where your son is”…..Standard response “Ya he is right hereeeee”, (Knowing in my “I am in so much trouble” mind, because I really had no idea and by the tone she does). I walk into the house, travel to the kitchen, head hung low waiting for the “Hell” I knew was awaiting me. To my surprise there stood my very pregnant wife with a grin from ear to ear, “Oh my GOD isn’t he just the cutest” as I follow her eyes from our kitchen through the window, there again in his glory, stands Chance my little whizzer peeing on the little cedar in the back yard, smiling at us, so proud of himself…. I thought when I spoke with him just a week earlier that I had implied to him to use the inside bathroom (Oops there was my mistake assumed a 2 and ½ year old spoke and fully understood Dadonese {which as all Dads need to understand when assume is broken down the word assume puts the ass into the u and the me}) He was the smarter one he did exactly what I asked, he just moved to the cedar in the backyard and out of the cul-de-sac!… My wife was right he is the cutest!........ And lucky for me that day Chances charm and cuteness kept me outta the dog house and made me realize it was time to close the cars hood and go play with my son!

I Love that kid!!!!

On a final note:
For the guy readers who only saw “Italian Sports Car”, if you ever…ever… think about buying the (You had to have it!) one of the fastest cars you have ever driven, massive horse power, quickest turning, Stop on a dime, gas guzzlers built in Maranello, Italy, think again….(Buy German!!!!)… Just kidding. Never let your hobbies or work keep you from the most important things in the world…Your Family. (I will save that explanation for another Blog)

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