As luck would have it? Luck of the Irish? Just lucky, I guess.
So much of life seems to be about luck. No, I am not getting overly superstitious on you. I recognize the importance of making good decisions, planning, working hard and having positive follow through. That goes without saying.
But, even with that said, in my opinion, luck has a lot to do with it. I have always considered myself a lucky person; usually landing on my feet, being at the right place at the right time, followed my gut instinct in tricky situations.
I have known people that just don't seem to ever catch a break. They seem to live under a black cloud with yet another problem or dilemma landing in their laps one after the other. Some people thrive in that kind of turbulent, every changing existence and find gratification after each hurdle surpassed. I personally fret for the lack of constancy and the turmoil of that sort of life, jumping from issue to issue trying to put out the immediate fire only to have another one pop right up. It just sounds really stressful.
When I began to realize that Shea had some real serious developmental delays, honestly I was stunned. I just hadn't seen it coming.
We have all heard the inevitable question; why me? Well, that is how I felt. Why me? I felt I had no frame of reference. I didn't know what to do, how to be or how to begin.
Honestly, I was surprised because I had always considered myself lucky. Why was this happening to me? I know, that is tough to say now but it is how I felt back then. I wondered if this was karma? Was I being punished for something I had done?
Time does heal and I have a much more pragmatic attitude now. Nothing will ever be as tough as those early days. Life is funny. I guess I just had a lot more to learn; something I never saw coming and wasn't prepared for. Plenty of good can come out of tackling something that is hard. In fact, sometimes the very best lessons of life come from something hard to take, sad or difficult.
Today, I still feel like that I am a very lucky person. And, at the bottom of it all I am an optimist. Need I count my blessings? Health, friends and family. Good old Jakey, married for 15 years. My beautiful Molly and charming Shea. I'm so lucky to have the time and resources to be home with them as they grow up. Lucky to be able to give them both what they need; to know they are loved, taken care of and safe.
So many children in this world aren't, to no fault of their own. Life isn't always fair.
Luck of the draw?
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
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